Dilemma!
Should I blatantly, thick-skinly advertise my addy on my wondrous msn nick that I now keep a blog?
I mean, there are always so much concerns rite? Like responsibility of thoughts, the impact it has on ppl, the backlash u might get (ala that famous blogging girl whose site I won't mention coz I dun wanna give free publicity... ha... siao!), that people might think you're manipulating... blah blah blah...
But you know what my greatest concern is?
That my quality of writing may not be impressive. I mean, why must my personal space online be perfect? But more on that another time...
I realized that Mag's words keep coming back to haunt me. Something to the effect of why would someone with better things to do keep a blog? So there's this bit of insecurity in being afraid that if I don't even have something good to say, then I'm like this totally no-life person with no talent and personality even... *glup*
Then again, come to think of it. The first bit is true at least... I really don't have much of a life now. Ha... exam period and all... so it's ok. =)
(excuses... excuses... excuses!)
Remember what I said about my blog space not being a diary? On the bus today, was actually thinking of putting down that I went Munchies Monkey with HL for a late dinner. ( I know I'm putting it down even though I implied that I wasn't going to, but this leads to a larger point. Bear with me...)
Keeping in mind that blogs are published with an intention to be read. This then points to my underlying psychological/subconscious desire to let people know that I DO have a life. Yea? Was also tempted to put down that my friend's a guy.
As I'm typing this, I can't help being amazed at what simmers within me when I do confront myself honestly. Who is it that I want to let them know that I do go out on dinner dates? (It's not a date honestly. Just dinner.) I mean, the intention is there to give the false impression that my life is definitely more "happening" than it actually is.
(this kinda sounds loser-ish...ha...but part of my being brutally honest with myself project)
I know who lah... which is why I'm hesitant about publizing the blog. Coz I'm afraid of the potential backlash. Reading people's blogs can be quite an obsessive way of keeping in the loop in other people's lives you know... ha...
(speaking from personal experience eh? *sheepish look*)
Paiseh...
Come to think of it, when we suddenly think of a person. Let's say like a friend in primary school or secondary school, it is termed nostalgia. When it is a close friend whom we're not so close to these days, it is nostalgia, regret and a sense that it is such a pity. Then, there are people whom you just miss...
Which is perhaps why I suddenly feel like posting my thoughts online. So that I won't be totally inaccessible to those I treasure. So that somehow, there's a thread linking us... Valiantly trying to retain the nuances of these relationships, of good old times...
Because people drift...
Like clouds...
Should I blatantly, thick-skinly advertise my addy on my wondrous msn nick that I now keep a blog?
I mean, there are always so much concerns rite? Like responsibility of thoughts, the impact it has on ppl, the backlash u might get (ala that famous blogging girl whose site I won't mention coz I dun wanna give free publicity... ha... siao!), that people might think you're manipulating... blah blah blah...
But you know what my greatest concern is?
That my quality of writing may not be impressive. I mean, why must my personal space online be perfect? But more on that another time...
I realized that Mag's words keep coming back to haunt me. Something to the effect of why would someone with better things to do keep a blog? So there's this bit of insecurity in being afraid that if I don't even have something good to say, then I'm like this totally no-life person with no talent and personality even... *glup*
Then again, come to think of it. The first bit is true at least... I really don't have much of a life now. Ha... exam period and all... so it's ok. =)
(excuses... excuses... excuses!)
Remember what I said about my blog space not being a diary? On the bus today, was actually thinking of putting down that I went Munchies Monkey with HL for a late dinner. ( I know I'm putting it down even though I implied that I wasn't going to, but this leads to a larger point. Bear with me...)
Keeping in mind that blogs are published with an intention to be read. This then points to my underlying psychological/subconscious desire to let people know that I DO have a life. Yea? Was also tempted to put down that my friend's a guy.
As I'm typing this, I can't help being amazed at what simmers within me when I do confront myself honestly. Who is it that I want to let them know that I do go out on dinner dates? (It's not a date honestly. Just dinner.) I mean, the intention is there to give the false impression that my life is definitely more "happening" than it actually is.
(this kinda sounds loser-ish...ha...but part of my being brutally honest with myself project)
I know who lah... which is why I'm hesitant about publizing the blog. Coz I'm afraid of the potential backlash. Reading people's blogs can be quite an obsessive way of keeping in the loop in other people's lives you know... ha...
(speaking from personal experience eh? *sheepish look*)
Paiseh...
Come to think of it, when we suddenly think of a person. Let's say like a friend in primary school or secondary school, it is termed nostalgia. When it is a close friend whom we're not so close to these days, it is nostalgia, regret and a sense that it is such a pity. Then, there are people whom you just miss...
Which is perhaps why I suddenly feel like posting my thoughts online. So that I won't be totally inaccessible to those I treasure. So that somehow, there's a thread linking us... Valiantly trying to retain the nuances of these relationships, of good old times...
Because people drift...
Like clouds...
cLoUd DriFteD bY @ Saturday, November 20, 2004 |
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